Life moves on. People move on. Time doesn’t stop for anyone. But we always wish to hold back the time; stretch it a bit longer so we don’t have to let go of those moments. We are afraid to go ahead, especially when we aren’t sure about whats in the store for us. Where are we heading? Is that the right choice or should we choose something else?
This constant battle within us always haunts us no matter how old we get. “What If” questions pop up every time we are in a dilemma. Leaving behind something or someone is always difficult. My first time was when I changed my school after 8th grade. Inside of me I always hoped I didn’t have to change my school. Everyday in my new school I wanted to go back to my old one, even though I made some friends there. I didn’t hate the new school but leaving the old one, those familiar faces of friends and teachers was upsetting.
Then after a few years I had to choose what I wanted to do when I had nothing mapped out in terms of my graduation studies. My 4 years of graduation wasn’t the best. I hated my college, the teachers, and some classmates. I hated the travelling in trains and buses, the weather that would add to the pain. But since I graduated a month ago I don’t know what to do and where to go. I have some plans, but life isn’t moving how I want it to. I don’t have a job at this moment. But now I hope I didn’t have to leave college. No matter how boring the lectures were, how much I hated the teachers or even going to the college, I hope the time comes back.
It was so good meeting a few friends, having fun, playing, going out, and talking to your crush. Being a college kid, life was easy without anything to worry about, except the grades. Staying up late, having night-outs, partying, watching movies while bunking lectures. Life was good in a way. So why is it so difficult to leave all this behind when the time comes?
Is it the change that we fear or the blurry future? Going out again in that new corporate world with new rules may give us all nightmares. Why is this so difficult? Why do every decision feel like a Wrong turn ?
Time can be so mysterious. It can change people, things, relations, futures, and pretty much everything. We want it to go on but also hold it back sometimes. Rewind back if possible to relive. It’s so fast yet so slow. It can heal you, enlighten you, make you as well as break you. It has the power that no other thing possesses. We are so small and helpless against time. It’s difficult to even write about it.